Vocabulary

 

 
 
 
 
 

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Transcript

 

Being deceived is the worst. Sure, sometimes it’s simply a small little white lie someone told, but other times, being betrayed by someone you trust can be painful and humiliating.

Once you’ve been lied to enough, you might even find it difficult to trust others, always trying to decipher whether their words are truthful or not.

Luckily, investigators in fraud and deceit have looked for decades for clues that can signal whether people are being honest or dishonest.

Of course, there is no one hundred percent accurate way to determine whether someone is telling the truth.

However, they have come up with a lot of tips that can help you catch deceptive people in their lies. Be sure to stick around until the end because the number one tip is our favorite for spotting liars.
 
Number 10: They will avoid using “I” or referring to themselves when describing a story.

When some people are being honest and telling the truth, they normally will refer to themselves using sentences like, “I drove to work at six a.m. When I pulled into the office, I saw two people outside the front door.”

In these two sentences alone, the honest person used the word “I” three times while referring to themselves.

A dishonest person who is lying will try to refrain from referring to themselves in the story and will instead replace the pronoun “I” with other words.

For example, a liar might phrase the above two sentences as such: “Drove to work at six a.m. Got there, and there were two people outside the office doors.”

As you can see, they managed to convey the same message and information without any self-referencing pronouns. Perhaps they do this as a way to distance themselves from the truth or to lie by omission.

By not referring to themselves and only giving fragmented statements without pronouns, they technically aren’t lying.

However, even though someone isn’t explicitly lying, it doesn’t mean that they aren’t deceptive. If you catch someone speaking in this manner, you may have a liar on your hands.
 
Number 9: Their average sentence length or mean length of utterance will vary.

The average sentence length is sometimes referred to as the mean length of utterance, or MLU for short, in forensic psychology. According to research in deception and fraud, most people’s average sentence length is 10 to 15 words.

However, when people are feeling anxious, particularly when lying, their average sentence length can vary significantly. If someone is lying, they might speak in short, abrupt sentences with little detail — or they might speak in long, confusing sentences that make the details difficult to zero in on.

Regardless, if you suspect that someone is lying to you, focus on whether their sentence length seems different than usual.
 
Number 8: The narrative of their story will not be balanced.

When you think of the plot structure or narrative of any story, you’ll probably think of it as having a beginning, a middle, and an end. Now, we know that reality doesn’t always fall into a neat plotline.

But even so, when people are telling a story, they will actually spend twenty to twenty-five percent on the beginning, forty to sixty percent on the middle or the critical event, and the remaining twenty-five to thirty-five percent describing the ending or the aftermath.

However, when someone is lying, their narrative structure of the story might be very off-balance. What would this look like?

Well, let’s just say that you knew your friend lied about going to the party the night before, declining your invitation to watch movies, claiming that they were tired and having a relaxing night in.

The next day, you asked them what they did during their night at home.

Because they’re lying, they may spend about fifty percent of their story describing their drive home from work, deciding what they would have for dinner, or anything prior to your invitation.

Then they might quickly wrap up the rest with a “then I had a nice bath and went to bed.”

The prologue or beginning, which is normally the shortest portion of any story, will usually hold the most credible details in a liar’s statement because the critical event and aftermath will be based on false information and deceit.

It makes sense that most liars aren’t able to create enough details to make the rest of their narrative balanced.
 
Number 7: They may only allude to actions without explicitly admitting to them.

Someone who is lying, especially if by omission, might do so by only alluding to certain guilty behaviors.

For example, say a parent asked their daughter if she took their car the night before without permission. The guilty daughter might answer with, “I thought about taking the car, but it was nice outside.”

The answer doesn’t actually confirm whether she did or didn’t. The daughter states that she only thought about driving her parents’ car, but that because the weather was nice, she alluded that she walked.

If you’re trying to get the truth from someone, make sure you confirm what messages they are actually conveying through their choice of words.
 
Number 6: They will make oaths of innocence.

You’d think that people would avoid making oaths of honesty when lying, as if they’d know it would only make matters worse for them once they’re caught.

But it tends to be one of the most common reflexes humans make when they’re lying.

Of course, sometimes people will use these oaths honestly, but often, if you hear someone say, “I swear I didn’t do it,” “As God as my witness,” or “On my honor,” when being confronted, you might want to be suspicious of their oaths.

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Number 5: They will be non-committal in their statements.

Guilty people will often be very vague and uncertain in their statements so they can modify them later if necessary.

They do this by using non-committal verbs and equivocating adjectives and adverbs. If you’re wondering what these are, don’t worry.

An example of a guilty person using non-committal verbs would be if they answer questions with words like, “I think,” “I guess,” or “I believe.”

If a child is lying about staying up past their bedtime the night before, for example, they might say, “I think I went to bed around seven o’clock.”

They know they actually stayed up till nine, but by using the non-committal verb “think,” they will have more flexibility to modify their statement if they’re caught later on.

Equivocations are weak or vague words like “maybe,” “almost,” and “perhaps” that liars and deceptive people will often use to evade accountability if they’re caught in the future.

For example, say you ask your partner if they scratched the paint on your new car when they pulled out of the driveway. They might answer with, “Maybe, but I’m not sure,” despite knowing they’re guilty of it.

By being given only a vague answer, you’ll be unable to know for sure whether your partner did or didn’t do it without further evidence.
 
Number 4: Deceitful people will often use words like “always” or “never.”

In contrast to the last sign, sometimes deceitful people will use black-and-white language like “always” or “never.” Perhaps they’re telling you, “I never lie,” or “I always tell the truth.”

Regardless, these black-and-white statements can be a quick indicator of dishonesty, as most humans are too flexible to be able to fit into “always” or “never” statements.

Thus, if you’re confronting someone about a lie you think they have told, and they get defensive, saying they would “never” behave that way, don’t blindly trust them. Instead, ask more questions to get the truth.
 
Number 3: They will answer your questions with more questions.

One way deceptive people evade answering questions is by asking a new question in response.

For example, if you’re beginning to become suspicious that your romantic partner is having an affair and you ask them, “Would you ever cheat on me?” If they’re lying, they might answer with, “How could you even ask that?” or “Do I look like the kind of person who would have an affair?”

Of course, sometimes people just ask these questions because they’re genuinely wondering. However, if they seem more inclined to berate you with new questions instead of simply answering the original one, you might have a liar on your hands.

Even liars will try to do anything they can to try to get out of lying, even if they have to distract you with new questions.
 
Number 2: They look at the exit while telling their story.

If someone is telling a lie, they’ll often look at the exit of whatever room they’re in, as if they’re subconsciously planning their escape.

Sometimes they’ll do this to give themselves a break from eye contact too if the guilt is beginning to weigh down on them.
 
Number 1: They will make clever use of euphemisms to try to get out of an admission of guilt.

Sometimes, when someone is lying, they’ll replace truthful words with softening euphemisms to evade admitting their guilt.

For example, instead of saying that they threatened another person, they will say that they “warned” them. They will claim that they didn’t “crash” into that car; they merely “bumped” it. Your friend didn’t “steal” your favorite sweater; they just “borrowed” it.

Be sure to keep an eye out for these euphemisms that can be a sign of deception.

 

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Questions

 

Deceive, Trick, Fool. Which is better, a deceitful, treacherous, opaque, backstabbing, swindling society; or an open, transparent, truthful, honest one?

Dishonest, Cheat, Lie. Active and passive sentences convey the same thing, for example, “I ate the cherry pie,” versus, “The cherry pie was eaten.”

Scam, Swindle, Rip Off. When people lie, do they tend to use very short, medium-length, or much longer sentences?

Betray, Backstab, Treachery. When recounting something, do liars focus on and describe in detail the crux or “climax” of an event?

Ambiguous, Vague, Nebulous. When lying, are people explicit or implicit about an action? Are they direct or indirect about an event?

Opaque, Obscure, Hazy. If a person says, “I swear to God . . . I cross my heart . . . You have my world . . . I’m telling the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth . . . May lightning strike me if I’m dying . . . ” they are more truthful and honest than some who does not. Is this right or wrong?

Duplicity, Double-Faced, Two-faced. What can you say about phrases such as “I suppose,” “As far as I know,” “It could be,” I’m not sure, but,” “I’m pretty sure,” “It seems that,” “From what I can tell,” “To the best of my knowledge,” “Probably”, “Most likely”?

Disloyal, Double-cross, Sell out. Define “euphemism”.
 
 
 
Loyalty, Trustworthy, Dependable. Do these ways of speaking sound familiar? Have you heard people talk like this? Who were they? Why were they speaking like this?

Honesty, Integrity, Probity. Can you tell when people are lying by the way they use words or the way they talk?

Transparent, Open. Should body language and lie detection be taught in school, and as a subject or course?

Responsible, Obligated, Liable. What might happen in the future?

Conscientious, Moral, Ethical. What could or should people, parents, teachers, the media and society do?